Check out the animated show Bat out of Hell on YouTube!

Archives for September 2014

Alphonse is kid’s [heavy metal music] stuff.

Look, I’m absolutely not suggesting that anyone should Google the covers of Dynamite Abortion’s Uterosacral Slamputation, Necrocest’s Prenatal Massacre, Impaled’s Choice Cuts, Raped By Pigs’ Squealing to the New World, or Vulvectomy’s Post-Abortion Sl…oh never mind. I’m just noting that when you peruse the collections of “goriest album covers” assembled by the Internet, you do tend to see abortion-related imagery.

Alphonse is kid’s [video game] stuff.

Screen Shot 2014-09-18 at 3.52.56 PM

Why yes, that is a wailing fetus-thingy in the playable teaser for the Guillermo del Toro-Hideo Kojima collaboration Silent Hills. Why do you ask?

Brushed Mohair Boyfriend Sweatshirt

brush jpg


Upstate, a weekend away from college,
Your roommate’s sister joined our coterie –
What boys define as men. With foliage
For fashion, the sunlight fading early
Became her figure’s fugue – so perfect, picturesque
In autumn, earthy, delicately picaresque.

The camera, tomorrow says, can’t lie:
About her marble skin, her hair a nest
Of robin’s wings – her emerald eyes rely
Upon arresting candor, prepossessed
As bees that flirt with failing thorn and dying rose –
But stuck in time, she strikes an adolescent pose.

Each minute, yesterday replies, construes
The truth of lies and strips from silks to flesh
What Madison Ave. only rues
But cannot refute. Context’s textile mesh
Imbeds in memory the silken worm of love,
But head cajoled the heart – till both could not believe

The evening air, so sharp and tang with leaves
In burning piles somewhere beyond the light
Of bonfires. Flame’s dancing logic still gives
Her face the look of truth while smoke and night
Still infiltrate her sweater’s cabled virgin wool:
It’s cold. She shivers, holds her hands in twilit fall –

And suddenly she looked at you across
The flame. You’d nursed your whisky flask to death;
Your eyes surmount their diffidence and toss
A glance her way. October steals your breath –
But dropping hands, she lets her eyes return to earth.
You wonder now what mocking god had given birth

To time and seasons. Heading back to school,
You thought about what could have been. You saw
Her once again – a final time – the cool
Of autumn giving way to winter’s raw
Emotion. Bundled up, she walked the whitened quad,
Her eyes as green as ever. Wink had passed by nod,

Your mute and shared admission fall occurred
At all. You turned to watch her slip away
Through snow that fell across the campus, blurred
Her lines, and failed to capture or portray
What, later, flying colors testified with lens
And film: that time and seasons hold no circumstance

With beauty’s rising smoke that, metal-blue,
Had veiled the milky spray of stars back then
When whiskey, fall and fire were all you knew –
Her fickle fame and fey adrenaline
Were waiting for the future, undeveloped prints
That cozened marketplace collateral. But since

That time, her rites of spring draw out modesty
In pencil skirts; her winter duffle makes
Its quilt-lined obsequies; her summers free
Bikini, brief and thong. But memory speaks
At last and turns the page to whiskey, fall and fire. You learn
For the first time: she’s autumn smoke, an ache, that burn

Of pure emotion, spilling now like ink
Across the colored capture, blotting out
The years, renewing face and form. To think
You knew her once so young. Without a doubt
Her eyes retain that fabled age of innocence –
What took J.Crew’s fall preview to experience.

Korrektiv Poetry Kontest, sponsored by J. Crew’s fall lineup

Here, I’ll start:
If you have a Vintage Straight Boyfriend
With a broken-in slouch ’round his rear end
Buy these jeans, they won’t rip
They’re relaxed at the hip
So his butt he can tone with a knee bend.

Today in Stealth Marketing


Today only: 20% off your purchase of $100 or more at Steve Madden Shoes

from the Hong Kong Transit Blotter

2006.04.27 23:00 Route #68X toward Yuen Long

More here:

Disapproving Dante looks down on me as I sip my Kentucky Buck at Polite Provisions

IMG_20140920_213843 Cheers, old mean. Man. I mean: Cheers, old man.

from the Seattle Transit Blotter

2014.09.20 17:35 Route #13 Third & Bell, Northbound

A couple in their mid to late 40s board the bus. Both are slender, fit, well dressed and in reasonably good spirits. Not at all down and out. He says, “for both of us,” and tries to feed a five dollar bill into the fare box, which the fare box refuses to accept.

Looking on, she says, “Must be one of them bills you got at a strip club!”

The bill is in fact the color of boiled spinach, a fairly sodden greenback that has lost any stiffness it once had, even as he pushes it forward.

“Yeah, right, when I was picking you up from work.”

“Phhh!” she says, rolling her eyes. “I wish!”

Paging Dr. Percy


Anybody got a name for the experience of being in one very pleasant place away from home and seeing an image of another very pleasant place away from home that you have in fact visited? There’s a recognition and a thrill. I think maybe it helped also that it was a painting and not a photograph, but I can’t be sure, as I’d been celebrating at the time and this was in the loo.

Furniture Clearance Sale

These items won’t last long! Act now or spend the rest of your life fighting regret with booze, pills and cheap sex.

Here, here, and here.