Fun with Bacon…

As regards authority I so proceed. Boetius says in the second prologue to his Arithmetic… ‘It is clear that whosoever passes these by, has lost the knowledge of all learning.’ – Roger Bacon

But, however, of saltpetre take six parts, live of young willow (charcoal), and five of sulphur, and so you will make thunder and lightning, and so you will turn the trick…. – Roger Bacon

But there is another alchemy, operative and practical, which teaches how to make the noble metals and colours and many other things better and more abundantly by art than they are made in nature…. For not only can it yield wealth and very many other things for the public welfare, but it also teaches how to discover such things as are capable of prolonging human life for much longer periods than can be accomplished by nature … – Roger Bacon

But concerning vision alone is a separate science formed among philosophers, namely, optics, and not concerning any other sense … It is possible that some other science may be more useful, but no other science has so much sweetness and beauty of utility. – Roger Bacon

“This is a dog, not a chicken. Chicken’s don’t look like dogs. Who told you this was a chicken, son? Nice boy, but doesn’t listen to a thing you say. You got a bum steer, son. I’m a chicken, not a schnook. You’re wrong, son.” – Foghorn Leghorn


  1. Cubeland Mystic says


    I can see why Lickona would be frightened by this, but the pure transcendency of the act is one of unspeakable beauty. I don’t think civilization will end in a few generations. I see this as an evolutionary leap forward. I foresee having porktinis while enjoying a martian sunset. Things are unfolding in my mind right now. I can hardly type. I am overcome.

  2. Churchill says

    Fuck off.

    • Cubeland Mystic says


      When Matthew saw the bacon in the martini that was his initial reaction too. He was just more verbose and indirect in his expression, but you could tell that he was thinking the same. However you must look past your initial revulsion to see the transcendent beauty and genius of this. It is not an abomination.

  3. Churchill says

    Sorry, you know I was joking, but I’m not at my best right now, in any sense.

  4. lansing priest says

    What does the Black Jack caulk go into?

  5. Jonathan Webb says

    Excellent use of the Weber. What a life you live up there.

  6. Weber was his mother’s maiden name.


  7. Cubeland Mystic says


    How was the martini?

    • Wonderful.

      To sustain the deviancy theme: I had the bacon garnish first, and the afterwards consumed the spirits – which held nicely the porcine flavor in subtle nuances of peppery smoke and fire.



      • Cubeland Mystic says

        There is something really appealing about that drink. Like I don’t care for chocolate dipped bacon and all the weirdness. I never tried it because it looks too revolting. But there is something really appealing about that drink.

      • Matthew Lickona says

        What you mean to say is, “The martini robbed the bacon of its very soul, as is often the case with demonic, unnatural practices, and teh theft was so complete that I was even able to detect the presence of that soul through its physical effects on the martini.”

        • Yes, intensely so! It was thrilling!


          • Angelico Nguyen, Esq., OP says

            Something demonic,
            Something lardonic:
            Something for Gerasene,
            A travesty last night!

            • Matthew Lickona says

              Something laconic
              Something Lickonic
              Something that can’t be seen
              A travesty last night!

              • Angelico Nguyen, Esq., OP says

                Not much of God,
                Not much of grace —
                True, but who cares?
                Let’s call CreateSpace.
                Bloggers and Percy,
                (Father, have mercy),
                It’s not like there’s that much to write.
                Manuscript tomorrow,
                Travesty last night!

  8. Quin Finnegan says


    I hit the “comments” button and was promptly directed to Churchill telling me to Fuck Off. The Brits supposedly have an entirely different sense of the word “fuck”, but reading Churchill here, I just don’t see it.

    Anyway, I was wondering where JOB could’ve gotten that Foghorn Leghorn quotation, and then I pulled my head out … actually, I don’t know that this is where JOB found the quotation, but if you were wondering where you might find a Foghorn Leghorn quotation, there’s a wikiquote page for him:

    “I can, I say, I can run faster than that in high heels *pause* I ain’t saying I wear high heels”

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