Today in Porn, Katy Perry Edition

“Hi! I’m pop star Katy Perry! You know: ‘I Kissed A Girl,’ ‘Hot n Cold,’ ‘Waking up in Vegas’? Anyway, I was a presenter at the Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards the other night, and I got slimed! And I cannot believe that some people on the Internet were suggesting that wearing a stripper wig and a skin-tight vinyl dress while getting my face sprayed with goo was somehow sexually suggestive? I mean, this is a kid’s show we’re talking about!

I mean, if I wanted to do something sexually suggestive, it’d be more like this, you know? My career thus far hasn’t exactly been built on subtlety.”

Lesson: If you can’t be a Catholic school-girl, a Pastor’s Daughter may be the next best thing!

Comments

  1. Rufus McCain says

    Good Lord, fame and girlhood prove once again to be a perilous mix, methinks. As if girlhood isn't perilous enough. Picture this on a tombstone: "I definitely have different perspectives and am very much not a poster child for anything perfect or organized or cookie cutter."

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