I gave my love a valentine
And a bottle of blood-red wine,
I sunk my teeth into my love
And said, You will be mine.
A plate of brains helps my migraines
But darling you’re the one
Who makes my feel like my own meal …
Please put down that shotgun.
I made my love a heart-shaped pizza
And read to her from Nietsche,
She said Oh Fred now God ain’t dead,
As Kierkegaard could teach ya,
But I do adore — please give me more! —
Your pepperoni pizza.