Yesterday’s news today! But my favorite part of this Movieline story about Steven Seagal’s casting session with Jenny McCarthy is the way she remembers, even under deep emotional duress, that porn is, first and last and foremost and hindmost, all about the money:
“I was wearing this very baggy dress,” she continues, “which I always wear to auditions, with my hair pulled back. I’m listening to him go on and on about how he found his soul in Asia and is one with himself and whatever. When I said, ‘Well, I’m ready to read,’ he said, ‘Stand up, you have to be kind of sexy in the movie and in that dress, I can’t tell.’ I stand up and he goes, ‘Take off your dress.’ I said, ‘What?’ and he said, ‘There’s nudity.’ I said, ‘No, there’s not, or I wouldn’t be here right now.’ He said again, ‘There’s nudity,’ and I said, ‘The pages are right in front of me. There’s no nudity.’ He goes, ‘Take off your dress.’ I just started crying and said, ‘Rent my [Playboy] video, you a**hole!’ and ran out to the car.”
As if he hadn't seen it! And hundreds of others like it.
But it's not as if we need to have a sit-down and reevaluate every opinion we've ever held about Steven Seagal. I don't mean to cast aspersions on men who wear ponytails, but …
After typing out his name, I've just realized that his last name is Seagal, like the Seagals, the dance troupe or cheerleaders or whatever it is for the Seattle Seahawks.
Make of it what you will.