Facebook Updates, August-Sept 2008

Rufus McCain is pondering.
Rufus McCain is neglecting the new puppy.
Rufus McCain is establishing an uneasy alliance with chaotic forces.
Rufus McCain is watching Wallace and Gromit.
Rufus McCain is sitting on the back patio keeping the puppy company.
Rufus McCain is on the verge of drifting into unconsciousness.
Rufus McCain is watching the Bee Movie with Tink and Joan.
Rufus McCain is sitting on the back patio smoking a cigar.
Rufus McCain is waking up.
Rufus McCain is tired.
Rufus McCain is caffeinated.
Rufus McCain is taking Joan on a nap ride.
Rufus McCain is back from the circus.
Rufus McCain is clinging to the waning days of summer.
Rufus McCain is drying off after a pre-school field trip to the fountain.
Rufus McCain is sitting in front of the evil computer thing.
Rufus McCain is waking to sleep and taking his waking slow while not necessarily going gentle into that good night.
Rufus McCain is updating his status.
Rufus McCain is sitting on the front porch.
Rufus McCain was last seen sitting on the front porch.
Rufus McCain is watching a performance of “The Dance of the Whale Princess”–a bathtub ballet.
Rufus McCain is walking the dog.
Rufus McCain is watching Sesame Street.
Rufus McCain was brought to you by the letter F.
Rufus McCain still awake but not for long.
Rufus McCain is back from the island.
Rufus McCain is pigging out in the park.
Rufus McCain is standing at the station waving goodbye to summer.
Rufus McCain just saw three bicycle cops interupt their espresso break to handcuff an unruly female drug addict who’d been accosting a mild-mannered balding middle-aged male.
Rufus McCain threw the dog out because he peed on the rug.
Rufus McCain needs more coffee.
Rufus McCain is sitting on the front steps thinking he needs a drink in his hand.
Rufus McCain is down to the last few pages of The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian. A great read!
Rufus McCain is trying to find time to read “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Managing Your Time.”
Rufus McCain is waiting for the coffee to enter his brain. Something seems to be blocking it.
Rufus McCain is watching Miss Spider.
Rufus McCain is picking up dog shit in the backyard.
Rufus McCain needs a nap.
Rufus McCain is sitting on the front porch, soaking up some sun.
Rufus McCain is sniffling.
Rufus McCain is retiring for the evening.
Rufus McCain is thinking about a line from a John Hiatt song: “Time is our friend, ’cause for us there is no end” and how that might apply to his upcoming midlife crisis.
Rufus McCain is sweating.
Rufus McCain is waiting and watching for signs of the apocalypse.
Rufus McCain is celebratin’ Talk Like a Pirate Day. Arrrrrrrrr. Avast maties!
Rufus McCain is going to Tink’s first soccer game.
Rufus McCain is blowing his nose.
Rufus McCain is getting ready to hibernate.
Rufus McCain is considering becoming a part-time zombie.
Rufus McCain has a sinus infection and is feeling sorry for himself while pondering the possibility of sleep.
Rufus McCain is mentally outlining the plot of an epic poem to be written entirely as Facebook status updates.
Rufus McCain rode his bike to work.
Rufus McCain is walking the dog in the rain, doing the dishes, putting the baby to sleep, drinking chianti, listening to Italian lessons on the iPod, taking out the garbage.
Rufus McCain is living the good life.
Rufus McCain looks out the window: blue-white sky, one seagull, a distant vapor trail, six crows, a FedEx truck, a young man with backwards baseball cap, trees, shadows.
Rufus McCain is getting a ladder out of the garage.
Rufus McCain stayed up too late.
Rufus McCain made chicken n dumplins for his sick wife, under her close supervision.
Rufus McCain is thirsty.
Rufus McCain is hungry.
Rufus McCain ate a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast.
Rufus McCain is squinting.
Rufus McCain was lying down on a park bench by the river soaking up the sun in the 85-degree heat pretending it was a carefree summer day; now he’s back in his office.
Rufus McCain rode the bus downtown this morning and walked the remaining few blocks to work, stopping by the Rocket Bakery for a chocolate-chip hazelnut scone.
Rufus McCain took the girls out while Mrs. McCain had a Pampered Chef party (whatever that is) and is now ready to collapse in a non-sentient fatherly heap.
Rufus McCain is eating oatmeal and drinking coffee.
Rufus McCain tidied up his office as a momentary hedge against the overriding chaos.
Rufus McCain is pledging to call bullshit bullshit, even when it’s his own bullshit, but especially when it’s someone else’s bullshit.
Rufus McCain is listening to Tell Tale Signs and likin’ it.
Rufus McCain is calling it a day.

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